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Why issit that people learn to treasure others only when they are gone? everyone im sure knows this but yet no one ever puts this into practice. we take things for granted and when that person is finally gone then only u come to regret, and feel sorrow.

Many things are like that in life. there are many things i regret not doing when ah ma was still here. i never treasured her as my ah ma. i never got to give her a hug and tell her how much i love her. i never got to see her one last time.

Ah ma is the greatest ah ma i have. but i never got to really treasure her and i took her for granted. i saw the pain she was in in the hospital and i felt so sad for her. she couldnt drink or eat anything and her mouth was growing ulcers. Her throat and body was aching. but yet i could do nothing but watch her in pain. she just had a simple wish to ask. she asked to eat an apple. but we could not even fufill that simple wish for her. all we could do was lie through our teeth and tell her we are cutting an apple for her.

Recently before o levels i told my mum that one day after my exams we should bring ah ma to the beach to relax. But we never got to do it. i used to go to ah ma house every saturday for dinner and gathering with my cousins. but as i got older, the times we went there just grew lesser. i visited her only occasionally and all these i regret only when she is gone.

i miss the happy times i had with ah ma, i miss her voice on the phone when she calls, i miss the food she cooks for us and i miss telling her how nice her food was. i miss having her constant care and concern for all the grandchildren and worrying for our well-being.

But at least ah ma is free from all this pain and suffering now. She has gone peacefully and all these suffering she has is also gone. i miss my ah ma and although it may be a little late to say this cos i nvr got the chance to say it but,

I LOVE YOU AH MA.